Money Talks….But It Doesn’t Walk

Don’t get me wrong, yeah I think you’re alright 
But that won’t keep me warm in the middle of the night ..Shania Twain was on to something. People have said over and over that money cant buy happiness. This is very true. It can buy a lot of things, and those things may make you happy but it is all temporary. They  also say money cant buy love. I believe that is a lie. Money buys “love” or what people think is love anyways. I have seen it over and over again when people I know date guys, one of the first things they are excited about is how much money their boyfriend makes. Instantly the talks go on and on about how when they get married they will do this and that and she wont have to work anymore and maybe she will just be a stay at home mom because the guy makes enough money ad is very sucessful. Sometimes I hear people talk about how when they look for a guy they have to make sure that he makes enough money to support her lifestyle. It all comes back to the initial deal breaker of opening yourself up to being in a relationship with somebody is whether or not they have a good enough job or make enough money to purse a relationship. I see this play out and I get it, it is nice to be with a man who can support you and make you feel taken care of. BUT at the end of the day when it all comes down to it, what was the relationship based on. If you date a guy with a lot of money how can you be sure that you are truly in love with him? Anybody can convince  themself that they love somebody when things are comfortable. BUT what happens when that comfort goes away. What happens when the man you are with loses his job, his business fails and you have to move into an apartment rather than the gorgeous home you built? What happens when those situations change? Things start to get rough because the comfort is gone. That is what happens when you put the amount of money that somebody makes onto the table when considering a relationship. At any point in time all of that can change and everything can be lost. I have seen a few breakups ad even divorces lately based on this problem and it really saddened me yet opened my eyes more.  Nothing is a guarantee in life. After my recent car accident I was taken off work due to the need for physical therapy being needed for my injuries before I go back again. What if I was married and the major source of income for my family, and what If I was permanently disabled in that accident and lost my career in nursing because I couldn’t work. The whole financial picture would change. That is the scenario that can happen to anybody at any moment and that is why I have come to learn that it should never be placed on the table for determining wether you are going to date somebody based on how much money they make or what they do for a living. It seems like a simple thing, and people tend to get really defensive when this is brought up, but really when it comes down to it, that is a huge factor affecting so many people today. In the bible it says, “the love of money is the root of all evil” that is very true. Money does terrible things to people. a lot of divorces get really ugly and it is usually the battle over finances. Greed is a terrible disease and it is easy to catch.  If you fall in love with somebody it should be because you cannot stand to be way from that person, and that person should be your best friend and complete you not just buy you dinner. When you have a relationship built on a solid friendship and good values it builds a good foundation.  I am in no way saying that if the person you are with makes a lot of money and you are “rich: that is a bad thing. it is not a bad thing. It just makes it easy to cloud the view on what a relationship is based on. 

I have dated a lot of wealthy people and I have learned a lot about them but one thing I didnt cave into was them using their wealth as power over me. I have dated men with the whole ferrari collection in their garage, men with private jets and men with more money than CHASE bank. When people have money it is easy for them to feel powerful. I have had people try many times to use their wealth to gain the upper had in the relationship and it doesnt even phase me anymore. I am able to see right through it now and to see the whole picture.  I can sit down with a guy that works at the corner car wash and have just as good of a conversation with him as the guy who owns a buisness and has a private jet. The truth is…at any moment the wealth can get taken away, and if I was dating the rich guy and happy with the lifestyle and all of a sudden he lost everything and had to get a job down the street at the car wash in order to pay bills, would I still love him the same…..the answer better be yes, and if you can run that scenario by anybody you are dating you will know deep inside where the root of the attraction is coming from. It is really sad and a hard thing to talk about but I have seen so many relationships end badly because they were based on circumstamces. Circumstances change. Make sure that you are on a solid foundation and ready for whatever life throws at you especially in relationships because nothing is guaranteed. Love is hard to find…make sure that you find it for the right reasons….money is tempting but it will always fail you…it may make life easier…..but that doesn’t mean that it makes it better. 

Girls- Get your career…make your own foundation…never rely on another person for anything. Never say that you want to be a stay at home mom and not have a backup plan….always be able to support yourself, you will be MUCH happier in life.  

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