Prison letters 2

I am at a point where I don’t know what to do. I have told my biological mother that I cannot support her being in prison and continuing to make the bad choices that get her there. She has hurt a lot of people in her life including me. I used to write her back-and-forth to try to motivate and encourage her. I have been doing that since I was 17. Before then I was too young to understand and I would communicate on the phone only. My life has gotten rougher in a lot of ways and I had to take a breather and take care of myself. I had sent her a letter telling her that I would not support her write her anymore because I had to take care of me. I really do struggle, because she continues to write me and begs me for communication. It’s a tough spot to be in, I guess because I’m not a mother I don’t understand. I am trying to be sympathetic and forgiveness is a choice, I have forgiven her but yet I don’t want to empower bad decisions. My first thought is to stick to my guns and to let her ride out the rest of her term alone. The other part of me continues to feel bad and thinks that I should write her. I need an outsider’s opinion because either way I’m not sure if it’s the right decision….. What would you do?

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6 thoughts on “Prison letters 2

  1. Hey Rachel,
    As a correctional officer I interact with inmates all day every day. One of the biggest things for them is being able to communicate with family, either via phone or mail. By communicating with her I don’t believe you are empowering her to continue in her bad ways. Empowering her would mean that you are providing her with the means and opportunity to make those decisions. By having communication with her you might be able to help her. It may take some time but you never know unless you keep trying but most importantly pray for her.

  2. She is using guilt to manipulate you. Plain and simple. If she really did care about you and not herself, she would understand and let you be to give you time. Do not feel guilty! Remember, it was her and her choices alone that have put her life the way it is. Just keep that in mind. Using the guilt the way she is just shows her selfishness. A mother doesn’t guilt her child into getting what she wants. I do understand her longing for a relationship, but she had numerous chances and chose NOT to take them. REMEMBER, her life was her choice. Don’t let her make you feel responsible for any of it.

  3. I just came across your blog and cried when I read this. I have a very strained relationship with my mom and sister, something I hate talking about. The fact that your sharing your past, lessons learned and heart is so empowering. When my sister was in prison she write beautiful heartfelt letters, but the moment she was out she was back to her ways … prison changes people, but so does freedom. I remember wanting to write my sister in prison, but I didn’t want to because I didn’t want to get her hopes up that everything between us was okay or that I supported her … Does that make sense?
    I’m rambling now, but I just hope this note finds you having a blessed day. Do whatever feels right and will leave you with no regrets ❤

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