WHICH MISERY IS WORSE!? You tell me…..comments appreciated…
When you walk past a man in a wheelchair with a disability, the first emotion most have is sympathy. We want to help, we “feel sorry for them”. We don’t know the story unless we stop and ask. Most times we would rather place money in the pot rather than stopping to ask their story; “Were you like this from birth, Was there an accident”? etc.
When you walk past a child who is 9 years old acting out n public, the first thing you may think is, ” what is wrong with that child, no respect, somebody needs to put that kid in its place”. What we don’t think of is that maybe that child is suffering just as much as the person with a disability in the wheelchair. You may have just walked past a child who has only one parent and that parent is never home. the child is left home with siblings and an uncle who repeatedly abuse, rape and torture her. She is starved, she is forced to do drugs, she is too young to understand the difference. She doesn’t have a voice to speak, and she doesn’t have a wheelchair to show her struggle.
When the man in the wheelchair grows older everybody will be there to offer assistance, there are government program to assist in everyday life and there are resources for him. BUT what about the girl who was tortured as a child? She is now grown up. She feels like she doesn’t fit into society. She has no friends, she hangs out in the wrong crowds just to get attention. She constantly blames herself for what she went through. she has no government assistance and no family support. She is ALONE. YET society looks down on her and offers her no help and looks at her as a bad example to the younger generation. The sad part is, in her brain, shnow has a mental disability she has been hurt her whole life and now is unable to trust others. She may never play sports, be active or get into a meaningful relationship not because she has a physical handicap that prevents her but because she has a mental one that does.
I have worked with special needs people and I have worked with PTSD and mental health patients. Each has a different story; One things is consistent= the struggles are different BUT the HURT is the same. the difference is the handicap such as no arms, no legs ; that is visible……the person with mental health issues from beating abused their whole life…those scars are hidden. I have talked to multiple people with physical disabilities; some had deformities from birth , some had an accident and are paralyzed, some were born without an extremity. Ont thing they all had in common when approached with this scenario was, they all agreed that they would trade an extra extremity and continue to live that way in order to save an innocent child from torture. Nobody is better than another, nobody’s sufferings are more valid. We need to be aware that there is more to a person than the way they compose themselves. there is a story in each of us.
I portray this in my autobiography I recently published to help motivate people; Taking Back The Pen http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Back-The-Pen-Predestinated/dp/0615874436 In the book I use a PTSD war patient example. Two soldiers are blown up by the same bomb. One soldier loses a leg, the other loses half of his brain functioning. They each have a permanent disability and are unable to function. The soldier with the lost leg has an abundance of resources, the one with the brain injury is hidden and nobody sees his disability. THE STRUGGLES ARE DIFFERENT BUT THE HURT IS THE SAME. WE ALL HAVE A STORY!!